We have access to a little slice of paradise and we’re going there this weekend for a rest. I plan to do a lot of lying on the couch and staring at the ceiling. This week has been insane.
I know I’ll always be a mom with a job, but there are some weeks I see the women wearing pajamas to drop their kids off at school and I have a moment of seething with jealousy that I don’t have the type of life that would allow me to do this. (Never mind that I think wearing pajamas to the store, school, wherever is pretty much like carrying a neon sign that says I HAVE NO PRIDE OR SELF CARE SKILLS OR MOTIVATION.)
Maybe I’m still a little tense.
Anyway, I know that we could live on the income from Fancyhats and that I could be one of those moms. But I also remember pretty clearly the isolation and loneliness I felt from not working.
And this brings me back to those women in their jammies. I don’t want to be that. I would like more time. More flexible time. But when I had that, it felt like time was just yawning in front of me, waiting to swallow me whole. I remember that feeling when I see these women and then I go to work and find a moment of peace and quiet at my desk.
Anyway, this week there was no peace or quiet. It was insanely busy. I’m lucky to have clients who trust me and have come to depend on me. I’m honored that they trust me with their budgets and ideas and reputation. I’m lucky to have clients who I genuinely enjoy. The flip side of this is they trust me to do more and more and more and then things get busy. That was this week.
To recover a bit, I’m heading to our little slice of paradise with my dudes. Paradise? Yep.